Letting Go of 2018

It's the end of another year again! 2018 feels like it's gone by quite fast. When it's Christmas I always think, "How is it here again?" lol. I find that once it gets to September, the remaining months of the year seem to go quickly. I started writing this a couple of days ago and it's now New Year's Eve. Last year I wrote a post about letting go of 2017 (doesn't feel that long since I did it!) which you can read here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/12/letting-go-of-2017.html

This year I'm going to do a similar post about letting go of 2018 and getting ready for 2019. :)

If you're interested in numerology, 2018 was an 11/2 universal year, so 2019 is a 3 year. It's said to be a year when our desires will take form and we'll expand more. Read more here: https://www.universallifetools.com/2018/12/2019-universal-3-year-numerology-spiritual-meaning/

My personal year number was a 6 this year, so 2019's will be 7. 6 was about harmony in love and family. I don't know if it was that accurate but I did make some new friends and meet new people this year. 7 is about learning and reflection. I use the book 21st Century Goddess for information abut my year number, but you can find your personal year number here: https://karisamuels.com/personal-year-numerology/

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

Christmas lights and decorations
Chocolate advent calendars- still like to have one!
Getting a Christmas tree for only £12 this year!
Meeting new people at a Meetup event
Fluffy blankets
Sunny days
Yule coming up
Christmas in general

Feeling Your Emotions- Fear and Anxiety (Part 2)

This is the next post in the Feeling Your Emotions series. You can read the introductory post here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/11/feeling-your-emotions-introduction.html

Disclaimer: I'm not a doctor, so if you're having mental/physical issues please seek medical help in addition to reading this. :)

Update 29/8/22: Several of the links have now gone or changed but I've updated where I can and added a couple of new ones. :)

I've previously covered Anger, Sadness and Depression and Fear and Anxiety. As I did with the other posts, fear and anxiety is divided into two parts. Part 1 which I wrote in October, looked at fear and anxiety themselves, the differences and similarities between them. Part 2 will look at feeling better, managing fear (like with sadness it's a normal human emotion, so we won't be able to get rid of it completely) and healing/coping with anxiety. You can read Part 1 here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2018/10/feeling-your-emotions-fear-and-anxiety.html

Now here is Part 2. While in the middle of writing this I ended up going through an anxious time. I intended to post it last month but never mind.

I'm going to look at fear and anxiety separately but sometimes things written in either section will overlap with the other. As well as looking at it from a psychological viewpoint, I'm also going to look at it from a spiritual perspective. :)


Worry

First I'll take a quick look at worry. So what's the difference between fear and worry? In Part 1 I mentioned how fear is more about a specific threat and anxiety is more of a vague unease. Fear has been defined as an "unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain and harm", "an unpleasant, often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of danger" and "a vital response to physical and emotional danger". Worry is when you think (or are afraid) that something bad is going to happen and you keep thinking about it, dwelling on it. Read more here: http://www.differencebetween.net/language/words-language/difference-between-the-words-fear-and-worry/

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

Going to firework displays for Bonfire Night
Going to a Maypole workshop with my belly dance group- although it's more a spring activity, it was still fun!
New slippers!
The Map of Time by Felix J. Palma- currently reading it
Coffee (hot and iced/frappuccino)
Christmas chocolate!
Last of the autumn leaves and colours
Hot chocolate


P.S. I'm currently taking part in Amina Makhdoom's Kindness Challenge which runs for a month (23rd Nov to 22nd Dec). We just started, so if you'd like to join you can read more and sign-up here: http://www.lunchwithcinderella.com/blog-posts/kindness

Gratitude List

This month I'm grateful for:

An Arabic dance workshop with Katie Holland
A Regency dance workshop with my group BD4U
Getting a charger for my new toothbrush that I got last month!
Beautiful autumn leaves and colours
October roses and sunny, golden days
Meetup events
Still the Hallowe'en chocolate (and doughnuts too!)
Hallowe'en/Samhain this week!

Bonus: Getting a new coat for winter.


And for a change, here are a couple of autumn pics:

Tree at Shoreham Library

Feeling Your Emotions- Fear and Anxiety (Part 1)

This is the next post in the Feeling Your Emotions series. You can read the introductory post here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/11/feeling-your-emotions-introduction.html


Disclaimer: I'm not a doctor, so if you're having mental/physical issues please seek medical help in addition to reading this. :)


I've previously covered Anger and Sadness and Depression. Now I'm moving onto fear and anxiety. Like I did with sadness and depression, I'll address fear and anxiety as two separate things. As with my previous posts I'll divide it into two parts; this part will look at fear and anxiety in general and the 2nd one will be about dealing with fear and worry, and healing anxiety/feeling better.

In my understanding, fear and anxiety are a bit different, but it is confusing. "Anxiety" is these days termed as a mental health disorder. I myself have what's called "health anxiety", also known as hypochondria. My type of anxiety has also been termed "phobic anxiety". I would say I also have generalised anxiety (GAD) and social anxiety (although to a lesser extent). I don't believe I've been officially diagnosed with the last two though. Let's look more closely at the differences between fear and anxiety.

Some people believe that fear relates to a specific threat whereas anxiety is more a vague unease.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel, author of It's Not Always Depression which I recently read, defines fear as a "core emotion". The core emotions are sadness, fear, anger, joy, excitement, sexual excitement and disgust. For more on this and the Change Triangle, a healing process and guide to feeling better, visit this link: https://www.hilaryjacobshendel.com/what-is-the-change-triangle-c18dd

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

Claire Baker's September Celebration
New kettle
Radox Feel Blissful bubble bath
South Coast Shimmy
Early Hallowe'en chocolates!
Getting a new electric toothbrush (although I need a new adaptor to charge it!)
Madron/the Autumn Equinox
Early autumn sunshine


And because Madron, also known as Mabon and the Autumn Equinox, is a time of thanksgiving, I'm going to write an extra list of 10 things I'm grateful for in general:

1. Books
2. Music
3. Chocolate
4. Sunshine
5. Family, friends and pets. :)
6. Living by the sea
7. Living near the country too
8. The internet
9. Sunsets
10. Notebooks

Feeling Your Emotions- Sadness and Depression (Part 2)

This is the latest post in my Feeling Your Emotions series. So far I've looked at Anger and Sadness and Depression. You can read the Introduction post here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/11/feeling-your-emotions-introduction.html

I split Sadness and Depression into two parts. Last month I did the first part which you'll find at this link: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2018/07/feeling-your-emotions-sadness-and.html

Now here is Part 2. :)

Disclaimer: I'm not a doctor, so if you're having mental/physical issues please seek medical help in addition to reading this. :)

Last time I looked at sadness and depression in general. In this post I'm going to be focusing on feeling better and healing. As I mentioned in Part 1, the focus is on healing depression, since sadness is a natural state that we all feel at some point. But I'm also talking about feeling better in general as well.


Self harm and suicide

Note: I'm discussing quite sensitive subjects, so please read with caution if you feel you may be triggered. :)

Important: If you are feeling suicidal here are some links to where you can find people qualified to help you right now:

http://lostallhope.com/help-me


UK/UK and Ireland specific:

Samaritans: https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us

NHS links (UK based): https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/suicide/ 

Childline (for children and young people): https://www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/your-feelings/mental-health/suicide/


Australia and New Zealand: https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/getting-help/emergency

US and UK: https://psychcentral.com/lib/telephone-hotlines-and-help-lines/


International:

https://ibpf.org/resource/list-of-international-suicide-hotlines/

https://www.befrienders.org/other-helpline-organisations

https://www.nowmattersnow.org/help-line

https://metanoia.org/suicide/

Update 12/9/22: I was getting an antivirus warning for the Metanoia link above and the page wasn't  loading (the Suicide link specifically).But it seems to be ok again now.

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

Lammas
Last full month of summer
Hot weather
Spindle's End by Robin McKinley- currently re-reading it
The return of the sunshine after the rainy spell!
Inspiring websites like Spiritually Empowered and The Whimsical Wildling*
Katie Holland's free Awakened Bellydance course- taking it at the moment
The strawberry cream milkshake I had at Buckingham Park cafe



*11/9/18: Now Eternally Elle.

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

The hot weather (although I have struggled a bit adjusting to the heatwave!)
Summer!
Ice cream at the park and beach
Going to the Black Rabbit pub in Arundel
New series/season of Bring It! showing in the UK (Mondays at 9pm on Lifetime)
New penpals
Skin-on fries (have had them while out and at home recently)
Having a meeting at Alcampo Lounge in Brighton with my belly dance group

Feeling Your Emotions- Sadness and Depression (Part 1)

This is the next post in my Feeling Your Emotions series. It follows on from Anger- Part 1 and Anger- Part 2. You can read the Introduction post here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/11/feeling-your-emotions-introduction.html

Disclaimer: I'm not a doctor, so if you're having mental/physical issues please seek medical help in addition to reading this. :)

Note: It's taken me a while to write this, I think like with anger, it's not a particularly easy subject. As with the Anger posts, I've decided to break it into two parts. This post will focus on sadness and depression in general, and the 2nd part will look into healing and what you can do to feel better in general.

I've titled this post "Sadness and Depression" because I believe they're different in the way that sadness is a natural state that everyone feels at some point in their life, whereas depression is more of an intense, prolonged sadness and it's classed as a mental health condition. I've also heard depression described as "anger turned inwards". So I'm looking at them both. For more on the differences you can read these articles:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201510/the-important-difference-between-sadness-and-depression

https://www.healthline.com/health/depression/depression-vs-sadness#symptoms

Update 4/11/19: This post explains it well: https://www.blurtitout.org/2018/01/04/understand-difference-sadness-depression/

Gratitude List

I normally post on a Sunday or Monday, but got behind, so it's a Tuesday post for a change!

Things I'm grateful for:

Hot weather
Going to the beach
Litha/the Summer Solstice
The proper start of summer!
Ice cream
Library books
New vampire book I bought
Positive online connections

Mid-2018 Reflections

Last year I did a post called Reflections writing a bit about how I was feeling then. You can read that here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/05/reflections.html

It was last May, so it's already over a year since I wrote it. I thought that since we're now halfway through 2018 I'd do a mid year reflection post. (Seems strange that we're already in June!).

On New Year's Eve I wrote a post called Letting Go of 2017 which you can read here:  https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/12/letting-go-of-2017.html

I always find it hard after the excitement of Christmas; New Year doesn't seem that exciting to me and then January is bleak because all the celebrations are over, and it's winter and cold. I like spring and feel better as the weather lightens up, but this year it seemed to take until May for me to feel like I'd really "eased into" the year. I enjoy following seasonal cycles and celebrating the Wheel of the Year, so I think a lot about how the seasons affect me. As I wrote on my other blog The Seasonal Life, winter seemed long this year but now summer is finally starting. During 2018 I'm reading Debrorah Blake's A Year and a Day of Everyday Witchcraft and Kate's West's The Real Witches' Year, both of which have meditations, spells or just something to think about for every day of the year.

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

Beltane
Eurovision
Sunny, hotter weather (summer is starting!)
Roses on the bush outside my window
New series/season of Teen Mom 2 starting
The Tribal Remix show I went to with my belly dance group
Having Harry Ramsden's fish and chips
Free reservations on non fiction books at my local library

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

Easter
Leftover chocolate eggs!
Blossom trees
Spring properly starting
The lovely summer like weather we had a couple of weeks ago
Joy Challenge with Amina Makhdoom- been doing it all month
Going to a Turkish restaurant with my belly dance group BD4U
Doing a tribal fusion/gothic belly dance workshop with Lianna Greene

Feeling Your Emotions- Anger (Part 2)

In February I wrote my first post on the Feeling Your Emotions series on the subject of anger. You can read the Introduction post here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/11/feeling-your-emotions-introduction.html

I decided to write two posts on Anger and you can read Part 1 here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2018/02/feeling-your-emotions-anger-part-1.html

Disclaimer: I'm not a doctor, so if you're having mental/physical issues please seek medical help in addition to reading this. :)

In the first post I wrote about anger itself and how suppressing it can be bad for you. I also talked about accepting anger. This post will focus more on releasing it. It's taken me a while to get back to this, since, as I said in my first post, I don't think anger's an easy subject to talk/write about. But I'm trying my best. :)

First of all, here is a good article I've found about anger management: https://pathwaytohappiness.com/blog/anger-management/

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

Having a nice birthday
Birthday wishes from friends and family
Going out for a meal at a Turkish restaurant with my belly dance group
Birthday meal at Nando's
Coming across books I want to read at the library
Daffodils and snowy daffodils! (We had more snow yesterday).
Oestara tomorrow
Cake!

Falling Petals' 5th Birthday + Fave Posts

Today is Falling Petals' 5th birthday. Wow, can't believe it's been 5 years! I started this blog on 25th February 2013. You can read the first post here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2013/02/welcome-to-falling-petals.html

As I said in the first post, the name inspiration came from Liza Dalby's book The Tale of Murasaki which I was re-reading at the time, about the real life Japanese author, poet and lady in waiting Murasaki Shikibu who wrote The Tale of Genji. (I actually just finished reading the book again). One of her poetry subjects was the seasons, e.g. the cherry blossoms in spring. She also observed seasonal changes like I do on my other blog The Seasonal Life.

On my About page I mentioned how when I first started FP I planned to have a more spiritual/philosophical type blog (compared to Star Sparkle Blog, the only one I had at the time which is about entertainment) but I was unsure exactly which direction it would end up in. I started writing more about self help/personal development, the Law of Attraction (LOA) and spiritual concepts, and then in 2016 I decided to make it a resource where you can find lots of information about self help/personal development, LOA and related subjects. I'm continuing to build up my Resources and Helpful Articles pages. (You can find them any time on the sidebar to the right of the blog). Although I post less often here than my other blogs- once or twice a month on average- I try my best to provide helpful content. :) Blogging here has helped me to express myself and work through things and I hope my post can help others too.

In celebration of FP's birthday here are the most popular posts and my favourites so far. (I've listed the popular ones by the most views).


Most Popular/Viewed Posts

Top 10 Self Help and Personal Development Blogs and Sites:

https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2013/05/top-10-self-helppersonal-development.html

Raising Your Vibration (Or Feeling Better): https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2014/10/raising-my-vibration.html

Law of Attraction: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2013/08/law-of-attraction.html

What Is Possible? (LOA)  https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2015/01/what-is-possible-loa.html

Romantic Love (part of The Love Project series): https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2015/10/the-love-project-romantic-love.html

Feeling Your Emotions- Anger (Part 1)

In November I started my Feeling Your Emotions post series. You can read the first post here: https://fallingpetalsuk.blogspot.com/2017/11/feeling-your-emotions-introduction.html


Disclaimer: I'm not a doctor, so if you're having mental/physical issues please seek medical help in addition to reading this. :)

As I mentioned in the Introduction, I'm starting with the more "negative" emotions first, the ones that are perceived as negative. So let's start with Anger. (I won't capitalise it for the whole post, just when I first introduce it). It's taken me a while to write this, I don't think it's a particularly easy subject to write because we're taught that it's "wrong" to be angry. But it's very important to discuss these things and express our emotions. I've decided to split it up into two parts, so for today I'll write about anger itself and accepting it, then the next post will be about releasing it.



A lot of stuff I've read says that suppressed anger can be bad for you. In itself it can be very destructive and if you hold it inside then it will hurt you. Depression is often called "anger turned inward". If you have depression (as I do) you may find it helpful to explore that more. I'll look more at sadness and depression separately later (grief might need its own post) but for now here are a few links on depression and anger:

http://www.transformationalwriting.co.uk/blog/depression-can-repressed-anger-cause-depression

http://www.emclear.com/Emotions/Emotions_depression.html

http://www.emclear.com/Emotions/Emotions_anger.html

Gratitude List

Things I'm grateful for this month:

Leftover Christmas chocolate!
Early Easter chocolate!
Neighbours coming back after Christmas
Corner House Resourse Centre (for mental health)
Uncle Sam's milkshakes
Boni Lonnsbury's The Map workbook- I've wanted it for years and then she had a sale before Christmas which made it more affordable for me
Watching the new IT and making popcorn the other night
Magical year books- Deborah Blake's A Year and a Day of Everyday Witchcraft and Kate West's The Real Witches' Year (been wanting the last one for ages!)